Dangerous thinking...

I'm going out to my Dads for a while soon. :)
Hopefully for like a week.
And I have been thinking...
Maybe it wouldn't hurt if I just.. went back to calorie counting. Just for a little while.
I know it sounds weird, but I miss it.
I still have soup out there, and I can take some low cal food out...

I just feel like, Weight Watchers is super supportive and stuff, but maybe a little too forgiving?
"Oh, its a new day tomorrow!" "We all make mistakes" "We're only human"
I kinda, almost need the anger and self hate that always comes back when I count calories. It's terrific motivation.
I got to my lowest recorded weight calorie counting.
So maybe, just for a while, I could do that...
I'm just so, so sick of looking in the mirror and absolutely loathing what I see.
This could be all brought on a little by the fact that I had a friend stay over the other night.
She's about the same height as me, but like, one third my size.
She's a model. Fricking gorgeous.
But anyway.

I think I will give this a go.
I can go running out at Dads, and I'll be alone a lot of the time, so it's ridiculously easy to lie about how much I eat.
I love my daddy, but he's a little cluless.

Stay strong. <3